The heroism of Eritrean Ascari

They Eritrean Askeri were indigenous soldiers from Eritrea, who were enrolled asaskaris ( in Arabic means Soldiers) in the "Royal Corps of Colonial Troops" of the Italian Army during the period 1889-1941.

  Those regular troops played an important role in the initial conquest of the various colonial possessions of the Kingdom of Italy. They subsequently acted as garrison and internal security forces in the Italian Empire Eritrea, Somalia and Libya mostly served in large numbers during the Italian conquest of British Somaliland and the World War 2 in East African campaign of 1940-1941

  One history writer of WW2 said "Except for the German parachute division in Italy and the Japanese in Burma no enemy with whom the British and Indian troops were matched put up a finer fight than those Savoia battalions at battle of Keren (Eritrea). Moreover, the Colonial troops, until they cracked at the very end, fought with valour, unexpected bravery never seen  and resolution, and their staunchness was a testimony to the excellence of the Italian administration and military training in Eritrea mostly the were born soldiers.

The Italian Army made extensive use of locally recruited indigenous soldiers inItalian East Africa. These troops comprised infantry, cavalry and some light artillery units. They were recruited initially from Eritreans and subsequently from Somalis, with Italian and Eritrean officers and some non-commissioned officers. The Italian Askaris fought in the First Italo–Ethiopian War, the Italian-Turkish War, the Second Italo-Abyssinian War and World War II (East African Campaign).

Out of a total of 256,000 Italian troops serving in Italian East Africa in 1940, about 182,000 were recruited from Italian Eritrea, Italian Somalia and the just recently occupied (1935–36) Ethiopia. In January 1941, British Commonwealth forces invaded Ethiopia and the majority of the newly recruited Ethiopian Askaris serving with the Italian Army in East Africa deserted. Most of the Eritrean Ascaris however remained loyal until the Italian surrender four months later.

The name "ascar" is the Arab word for "soldier". The Eritrean Ascari originated from a mercenary Arab group employed by the Ottoman Empire and called Basci Buzuks. This irregular force was created in Eritrea by the Albanian adventurer Sagiyak shagiah) Hassan, who worked for local Eritrean tribes in the second half of the 19th century.

In 1885 the Italian colonel Tancredi Saletta commanding officer of the Italian troops during the conquest of Eritrea, brought the Basci Buzuks (with their armaments and families) into Italian service as irregular auxiliaries. In 1889 the first four regular battalions of Eritrean soldiers were created in Asmara. Those Eritrean troops were incorporated into the Italian Army with the name Ascari They were successfully used in battle by the Italians, for the first time, against the Dervisci inSudan.

Initially the Eritrean Ascaris comprised only infantry battalions, although Eritrean cavalry squadrons (Penne di Falco) and mountain artillery batteries were subsequently raised. By 1922 units of camel cavalry called "meharisti" had been added. Those Eritrean camel units were also deployed in Libya after 1932. During the 1930s Benito Mussolini added some armored cars units to the Ascari.

Eritrean regiments in Italian service wore high red fezzes with coloured tufts and waist sashes that varied according to each unit. As examples, the 17th Eritrean Battalion had black and white tufts and vertically striped sashes; while the 64th Eritrean Battalion wore both of these items in scarlet and purple. The Eritrean Ascari had the following ranks, from simple soldier to senior commissioned officer:Ascari - Muntaz (corporal) - Bulukbasci (lance-sergeant) - Sciumbasci (sergeant).
Sciumbasci-capos (staff-sergeants) were the senior Eritrean non-commissioned officers and were chosen according to their fighting performance in battle. All commissioned officers of the Eritrean Ascari were Italian.

Their performance in both world wars the Eritrean Ascari were considered the best of Italy's colonial soldiers, the British, Indians and the Free French Resistance Army  with a reputation similar to that of the Gurkhas in the British Empire forces.

Their Notable events in the history of Italy's Eritrean Ascaris included:

Battle of Agordat - (Mahdist WarBattle of Kassala - (Mahdist WarBattle of Coatit - (First Ethiopian WarAbout six thousand Eritrean Ascaris, serving in both infantry and artillery units, were present at the Battle of Adwa were they fought against 120,000 Ethiopians on 1 March 1896. In the Italian conquest of Ethiopia (1935–1936) the veteran Eritrean Ascaris, with their high morale and aggressive spirit, played a key role, often taking the lead role for the first time, during attacks.About 60,000 Eritreans served in both regular ascari units and in irregular bands. Nearly2000-5000 Eritrean Ascaris were killed in this war.During World War II a number of Eritrean Ascari were awarded the Gold Medal for Military Honor at both the Battle of Keren and at the Amba Alage (Ethiopia) of the remaining Ascari fought with lieutenant Amedeo Guillet in his Italian guerrilla against the Allies after the Italian Army surrender in Gondar in November 1941.

One of the most famous Italian officers who commanded groups of Eritrean Ascari in Ethiopia and Eritrea was Amedeo Guillet.

At the beginning of World War II the Italian Viceroy Amedeo Duke of Aosta gave lieutenant Guillet command of the 2,500 strong Gruppo Bande Amhara, an irregular unit made up mainly of recruits from Ethiopia's region of Amhara. This force was primarily a cavalry one, but also included camel mounted troops and some Yemeni infantry led by Eritrean Ascari NCOs.

At the end of 1940 the British Empire forces faced Guillet on the road to Amba Alage. He was charged with the task of slowing the allied advance from the North-West. His Eritrean/Tigrian ascaris had some success in doing this but suffered many casualties. Guillet's most important battle happened towards the end of January 1941 at Cherù when he decided to attack enemy armoured units. At dawn the Gruppo Bande tigray, armed only with Sabres and Gandie  rifles and hand grenades charged an allied column which included armoured vehicles. They passed unhurt through the British force who were caught unaware. Guillet then turned to charge again. In the meantime however, the British had organised themselves and fired horizontally with their howitzers, inflicting heavy losses on the Italian-led troops and their horses. This was the last cavalry charge the British faced and the last but one in the history of Italian cavalry.

Guillet's Eritrean and tigray ascaris suffered losses of about 800 in little more than two years. In March 1941 his forces found themselves stranded outside the Italian lines. Guillet began a private war against the British. Hiding his uniform near an Italian farm, he conducted guerrilla raids with his remaining ascaris against British and the new Ethiopian empire forces for almost eight months. He was one of the most famous Italian "guerrilla officers" in Eritrea and northern Ethiopia during the Italian guerrilla war against the Allies occupation of the Italian East Africa.

Let's look at Eritrean Ascari after World War II. Many Eritrean Askari fought for the independence of Eritrea after WWII. The most famous was Hamid Idris Awate, nicknamed the Father of Eritrea because or the Lion of Barka, he who fired the first shots of the Eritrean War of Independence against the Ethiopian colonial empire on 01/09/1961 as we call it ባሕቲ መስከረም on Mountain Adal.

After the official end of the Italian Empire in 1947, the Italian government has dedicated some efforts to maintain organizations related to the Ascari in Italy and Eritrea.

In 1950 the Italian authorities created a pension fund for nearly 140,000 Eritrean Ascari who had served in the Italian colonial Army. Even if the amount was minimal (the equivalent of $100 yearly), this was paid in the Italian Embassy of Asmara and was of some value in the underdeveloped economy of Eritrea after World War II.
In 1993 1,100 Ascari were still living in Eritrea, but by 2006 only 260 were known. One surviving ascari, Beraki Ghebreslasie, lives in Rome Italy.

Massawa The Pearl Of the Red Sea!

The very name conjures up an air of mystique and hidden delights. Massawa! City of islands and the ‘Pearl of the Red Sea’, a city which for centuries has been one of the region’s most important ports, and which once, more recently, was the Italian capital of Eritrea. a city whose charm has been influenced over the past centuries by the Portuguese, the Arabs, the Turks, the Egyptians, the British, the Italians and, most of all, the Eritreans themselves.

Massawa’s development was initially influenced by the Arabian Peninsula. Massawa was turned into a renowned center of intellectual and artistic skills, and this is reflected in the city’s architecture. New ideas implemented over the years by a host of different nationalities, until the British, determined to stamp out the growing French influence in the region “took” Eritrea from the Egyptians in 1882 and then “gave” the territory to the Italians in 1885. Massawa thus became the headquarters of the embryonic Italian colony, until the permanent capital was created at Asmara in 1887.

To supply their new capital from Massawa, the Italians initially used a cable car – the longest in the world – to winch up provisions from the port on the shore to 2500m below. As the new capitals population exploded, however, this became impractical, and they installed a railway line, whose construction was beset with engineering difficulty because of the escarpment between the port and the capital, and it finally reached Asmara in 1922. For almost half a century the railway moved goods and people across Eritrea. It took 6 hours from Massawa to Asmara at an average speed of 19km an hour up the escarpment. The line opened up new markets for farm produce, and towns such as Nefasit, Keren and Agordat prospered; as such Massawa prospered as never before. Up until the 1960s, Massawa was by far the largest, the safest and the most lucrative port on the East African littoral.

During the wars that have befallen Eritrea since, the railway was dismantled piecemeal by the British. Beginning from 1993, veteran railway workers were enlisted to repair the old locomotives and railway stock and began relaying the tracks, starting at Massawa. After years of back breaking work and true grit, the railway is now once more functional.

With its low, whitewashed buildings, porticoes and arcades, Massawa has an Arab feel to it, reflecting its century-old connection with Arabia across the other side of the Red Sea. Massawa`s natural deep harbour and its position close to the mouth of the Red Sea and Indian Ocean have long made it the target of foreign powers. It was occupied by the Portuguese, Arabs, Egyptians and Turks; they all but handed it over to the Italians in 1885. Trade in Massawa flourished throughout these occupations- everything from slaves, peals, giraffes and incense to Ostriches and myrrh passed through this port.

Its buildings reflect its history of occupation. The Ottoman Turks, who occupied the city for nearly 300 years, had the biggest influence on the architecture. Their successors, the Egyptians, also left a legacy of buildings and public works, including the elevated causeways, an aqueduct and the governor’s palace. In 1885 the Italians occupied Massawa and the town became their capital until it was superseded by Asmara in 1897. During this time, many of the fabulous villas were built.

Massawa consists of two islands, Tiwalet and Old Massawa(Wishti Batzie). The mainland area, called Old Massawa, is largely residential, and a long causeway connects it to Tiwalet Island, which is home to some old villas, the administrative buildings, and a few of the town’s smarter hotel. The cause way that connects the two islands was built by the Swiss adventurer Werner Munzinger in the 1870s.

The two islands – now linked to the mainland by the causeways – that form Massawa are intriguing and attractive. As you come over the cause way to the Taulud Island, a broad sweep of white, arcaded palazzi (palaces) stretches over before you. On the corner, opposite the transport office, the Hotel Savoiya, with its long gallery, has a great view over the harbour. Near the port entrance is a good example of 17-century coral-block house. For centuries coral was the local building stone. Heading back toward the causeways, you will pass the large Banco d’Italia, an exact copy of its 1920s original and a mishmash of architectural styles, including Gothic windows and towers. In a square beyond the Banka is a rare example of aTurkish house with a doomed roof, now impressively restored. Shaafi Mosque – one of the oldest mosques in Africa, by the port entrance, was founded in the 11th century but rebuilt several times since, is worth a quick look. An ancient house across of Mammud Mohammed Nahari is there with soaring Ottoman-style windows on every side. Opposite the house is the 16th- century tomb of Sheikh Durbuh enclosed in a small garden. Nothing is so far known about the Sheikh. Around this area are some large and ornate18th-century Armenian and Jewish merchants houses.

About 150m from the port entrance, is the house of Abu Hamdum, with its magnificent mashrabiyya (trellised) balcony, which allowed cool breezes to enter and the air inside to circulate. It is a great example of Turkish Ottoman architecture. Nearby is Piazza degli Incendi (meaning ‘Square of the Fire’, after it was the scene of a great fire in 1885), in the center of which is the Sheikh Hanafi Mosque. At over 500 years old, this mosque is one of the oldest surviving structures in the city. Seikh Hanafi was a great teacher, who funded his students’ studies in Egypt. The walls of the courtyard are decorated with stuccowork and inside hangs a remarkable chandelier from the glassworks of Murano near Venice in Italy.

Just north of the gate of the Dahlak Hotel is the old Imperial Palaceoverlooking the harbour. The original palace was built by the Turkish Osdemir Pasha in the 16th century. The present building dates back from 1872, when it was built for the Swiss adventurer Werner Munzinger- then employed for the Khedive of Egypt. The palace also contains the first elevator in Eritrea. Look out for the beautifully carved wooden doors, said to come from India. Some of the villas near the shore are exceptionally beautiful, combining elements of Art Deco style with traditional Moorish arcades and huge mashrabiyya balconies. After about 500m is Orthodox St Mariam Cathedral, which sits at the end of the causeway from the mainland was built in 1953 by the Orthodox Church. Opposite to the cathedral is the massive Tank Monument to the Eritrean Struggle for Independence. Three huge tanks are preserved where they stopped in the final assault on the town in 1990, and now stood on a black marble base. South of the cathedral is the famous Red Sea Hotel, scene of many glamorous balls in 1960s and 1970s.

The coast of Massawa is also renowned for shipwrecks, some of them in very good condition. These include wrecks of World War II Italian warships, frigates and even tanks. Some of them lie only 3m below the surface while some are far deep as 4km. Life under the sea, off Massawa east coast opens up a veritable treasure chest of colorful fish and exotic corals. Some distinctive forms are “fan corals” or Gorgonacea, tree corals of Nepthiidea family, “fire corals” or Millepora et cetera.

ስነ-ጽሑፍ ኣብ ኤርትራ ቅድሚ ምምጻእ መግዛእቲ

    ቅድሚክልተ ሽሕዓመት ኣቢሉ። ኣኽሱምከምጊላዊት ንግስነትማዕቢላትሉ ኣብ ዝነበረት ግዜ። እቲ ህዝቢ ናይ ገዛእ ርእሱ ፊደላት ብምምሃዝ ጽሑፋት ጀሚሩ ነይሩ’ዩ፣ እዚ  ከም ፉሉይ ኮይኑ ዝርአ። ኣፍሪቃዊ መበቆል ዘለዎ ካልእ ፊደላት። ኣብ ዝኾነ ካልእ ክፍልታት ኣፍሪቃ ዘይርከብ ብምዃኑ’ዩ፣ ከም’ዚ ዝኣመሰለ ፊደላት ብምህላዉ። ስነ-ጽሑፍ ኣብ ሃገርና ቀልጢፉን ብሰፊሑን ክምዕብል’ዩ ዝግባእ ነይሩ፣ ሓደ ካብ’ቲ ኣዝዩ ዘተሓሳስብ ነገራት። ህዝብና ምስ ክጥቀመሉ ዝኽእልን ኣብ ኢዱ ዝነበረ ፊደላትን ኣብ ኣዝዩ ትሑት ስነ-ጽሑፋዊ ምዕባለ ዝርከብ ምዃኑ’ዩ፣ ከም’ዚ ክኸውን ዝኸኣለ ቀንዲ ምኽንያት ብንጹር ንምፍላጥ እኳ። ስፍሕ ዝበለ መጽናዕቲ ብዛዕባ ኣመዓባብላ ጥንታዊ ስነ-ጽሑፍ ኣብ ሃገርና ምክያድ ዘድሊ እንተኾነ። ሓፈሻዊ ምኽንያታት
ምቕራብ ይከኣል’ዩ፣ ኣቐዲሙ ጥንታውያን ግሪኻውያንን ሮማውያንን በብቋንቁኦም። ብዛዕባሃይማኖት ጥራይ ዘይኮነ። ብዛዕባ ፍልስፍና።ታሪኽ። ማሕበራዊ ህይወት.. ግጥምታት። ዜማታት። ልብ ወለዳት ይጽሕፉ ከም ዝነበሩ ይፍለጥ፣ እዚ ብጥንታዊ ቋንቋታት ዝድረስ ዝነበረ ስነ ጽሑፋዊ ስርሓት። ብሰፊሑ ይንበብን ኣብ ክብ ዝበለ ትምህርታዊ ትካላት። ከም ትምህርቲ ይውሃብ ከም ዝነበረ።
    በቲ ህዝቢ ክፍለጥን ከም መንቀሊ ናይ ቀጻሊ ጽሑፋት ከገልግልን ከኣለ፣ቋንቋ ግእዝ ግን። ከም ቋንቋ ግሪኽን ላቲንን ዓቢ ተራ ክጻወት ኣይከኣለን፣ ብቐዳምነት ብግእዝ ዝተጻሕፉ ንሃይማኖት ዘይምልከቱ መጽሓፍቲ ብብዝሒ ዝነበሩ ኣይመስልን፣ ኣብ ሕብረተሰብና ብሰፊሑ ተዘርጊሑ ዝርከብ ናይ ግእዝ መጽሓፍቲ።ብቐጥታ ብዛዕባ ሃይማኖት’ዩ ዝዛረብ፣ እቲ ከም ‘ፍትሓ ነገስታት’ ዝኣመሰለ ብዛዕባ ሕግን ምምሕዳርን ዝሕብር እንተኾነ’ውን ሃይማኖታዊመበገሲ ዘለዎ’ዩ፣ እዚ እውን ዝበዝሐ ካብ ናይ ጥንቲ ናይ ኢብራይስጥ። ግሪኽ ወይ ዓረብ ዝተተርጎመ እምበር። ኣፍሪቃዊ መሰረት ዝነበሮ ኣይኮነን፣እዚ ኣዝዩ ሕጹር ትሕዝቶ’ዚ። ነቲ ናይ ግእዝ ስነ-ጽሑፍ ናብ’ቶም ዝወለዶም ቋንቋታት ዘመሓላልፎ ውርሻ ውሱን ክገብሮ ግድን’ዩ፣ ካብ’ዚ ዝገደድ ግን።
ግእዝ በተን ዝተፈላለያ ሴማውያን ቋንቋታት ትግረ። ትግርኛ። ኣምሓርኛ እናተተክአ ምስ ከደ ናይ ቤተ ክህነት ቋንቋ ኮይኑ ጥራይ ብምትራፉ። ምስ ስነ- ጽሑፍ ካብ’ቲ ህዝቢ ብምርሓቑን ኢዩ፣ ከም’ዚ ስለ ዝኾነ ቋንቋታት ትግረን ትግርኛን። በቲ ካብ ግእዝ ክወርስዎ ዝግብኦም ዝነበረ ፊደላት ከይተጠቕሙ ስለ ዝተረፉ። ከም መሰረት ናይ ቀጻሊ ምዕባለ ክኸውን ዝኽእል ስነ-ጽሑፋዊ
ታሪኽ ክገድፉ ኣይከኣሉን፣ ከም’ዚክበሃልኣንከሎ።ብፍላይቋንቋትግርኛንምጽሓፍፈተነታትኣይካየድን ማለት ኣይኮነን፣ ንኣብነት ሕግታት እንዳ’ባ ካብ መበል 16 ክፍለ ዘመን ኣቢሉ ክጸሓፍ ጀሚሩ ነይሩ ይበሃል፣ እቲ መበቆላዊ ቅድሓት ናይ’ዚ ሕግታት’ዚ
ግን። ብዝተፈላለየ ምኽንያታት ክርከብ ስለ ዘይከኣለን ኩሉ ሕግታት እንዳ’ባብቃልን ልምድን ካብ ዝተመሓላለፈ ተመጻርዩ ኢዩ ምስ ምምጻእ መግዛእቲ::
    ኢጣልያን እንግሊዝን ብጽሑፍ ክሰፍር ዝኸኣለ፣ ንኣብነት ብዛዕባ መበቆልሕጊ  ‘ኣድከመ ምልጋእ’ ክግለጽ እንከሎ። ኣብ’ቲ መቕድም ከም’ዚ ይብል።“…ስርዓት ኣድከመ ምልጋእ ብቓል ጥራይ ዝነበረ ከይመስለኩም። ኣቦታትና ከምዘዘንተውልና ጽሑፍ’ዩ ዝነበረ። ምቕማጡ ድማ ኣብ ደብሪ ኣቡነ ዮናስ’ዩ ዝነበረ፣ ብኩናትን ህውከትን ጠፊኡ ይበሃል፣” ስርዓት ‘ኣድግን ተገልቦን’ እውን
ተመሳሳሊ ዕድል ከም ዘጓነፎ ይግለጽ፣ ብዘይካ’ዚ ዝተጠቕሰ ሕግታት ካልእ ከም “ክርስቶስ ገብረመስቀል። ሸውዓተ ዓንሰባ..ወዘተ ዝኣመሰሉ። ብጽሑፍ ይሰፍር ነይሩ’ዩ፣ እንተ’ኾነ ግን ፈጺሙ ስለ ዝጠፍአ ወይ ድማ ኣብ ውሱን ቦታታት ተዓቂቡ ስለ ዝተረፈ። ከምመበገሲ ናይ ስነ-ጽሑፍ  ኮይኑ ከገልግል ኣይከኣለን፣ በዚ ምኽንያት’ዚ ዳርጋ’ቲ ኩሉ ኣብ ሕብረተሰብና ዝነበረ ልምድታት። ያታታት። ጽውጽዋያት። ደርፍታት…ወዘተ ብቓል ጥራይ’ዩ። ካብ ውሉድ ንወለዶ ክመሓላለፍ ዝጸንሐ፣ ላዕሊ-ላዕሊ ክርአ
እንከሎ እዚ ብቓል ዝመሓላለፍ ልምድታት ብዙሕ ኣገዳስነት ዘይብሉ ይመስል ይኸውን፣ እንተኾነ ግን ስነ ኣእሙራዊ  ኣቃውማ ናይ ሓደ ህዝብን ደረጃ ምዕባሊኡን ስለ ዝሕብር ከም ፍሉይ ኣርእስቲ ኣሕጽር ኣቢልካ። ምትንታኑ
ጠቓሚ’ዩ::

High School Love

Many people including me consider our high school years to be the best part of our life - and they have good reasons to feel this way. High school is a time of youth, rebelliousness, and hormones. It's the first time when we actually get a taste of freedom. Because of these reasons, high school relationships are often intense, full of possibilities, and may even lead up to a lifelong commitment or Pain for life long.

  When people meet in high school, this means that they meet during a time when they're still trying to figure out their identity. Our personalities during this delicate time are very dynamic - our interests, friends, and hobbies change constantly. Because of this, keeping a high school relationship takes a lot of energy and effort. The good thing about this is that we can use the high school love lessons later on in life.

Here are some of the lessons we learn from our high school relationships:

Love can be like a fairytale... until reality sets in.

Remember your first fight with your high school love? It probably seemed like the end of the world, but most high school girlfriends and boyfriends get over their first fight and reconcile. They also form a stronger bond after this. After your first fight with your first love, you'll learn that true love weathers through everything.

Look beyond appearances.

If you or one of your friends ever had a crush on the most unlikely people, you know exactly what I mean. Everyone seems to fall for the jocks and the cheerleaders, but once in a while, someone becomes attracted to the bookworms or the chess team captains. Just because a person doesn't have a pool or a nice car, it doesn't mean that they don't know how to sweep you off of your feet.

Let the other person know how you feel.

Most shy people regret not telling their high school crush about they way they felt - and they're right to feel this way. Regret is a hard thing to live with, and while we don't know this in high school, we'll know it a few years after graduation. The atmosphere that high school has is pretty much "live for the moment", and this is a philosophy that you should carry with you for the rest of your life. After all, you have nothing to lose. If the other person isn't open to feeling the same way about you, consider it their loss.

You win some, and you lose some.

Teenagers aren't exactly easy to gauge - it's hard to tell if someone likes you back or not. Whether you're asking someone out on a date or to the prom, you're bound to get rejected at least once. While rejections may hurt, it's best to keep in mind that there are more fish in the sea, and that someone out there will be happy to say "yes" to you. The rejections you get in high school tend to toughen you up, and they teach you to take pleasure in hope when things don't go your way.
Oh high School!!!!!

How To Hate A Person Whom You Love Very Much But He Doesn't Love You?

well if I'm not wrong It's very tough to hate a person whom you love very much, but he doesn't love you...it's also not really the answer. Hate is a very powerful, destructive emotion that tends to harm the person who feels it. Hate is dark and bitter - while it's easy to understand why you'd want to stop loving someone, because your love is not returned, hating them is not going to stop the pain, because feeling hatred is just another form of pain, directed mostly at the self.

Ways To Get Over Someone

• The best way to get over someone is simply to give yourself time to recover from the emotions you're feeling. Love may happen fast, but it can fade fast, too - especially when love is unrequited. When love is not returned, it tends to die; you could compare it to a plant that isn't receiving sunlight, water, and oxygen. In time, if your love is not returned, it will likely die a natural death. In a month, or a few months, your feelings will start to lose their intensity - that is a sign that you have reached some level of acceptance about the situation.

• Sometimes, when the pain of loving someone does not go away, it is a symptom that something is wrong; certain personality disorders, such as borderline personality disorder, can trigger painful obsessions with other people. Sometimes, the struggle of enduring unrequited love will also triggers mental disorders, such as depression. Luckily, these disorders can be soothed and eased with therapy. Finding a good therapist is an excellent way to take care of yourself while you are experiencing these emotions.

Hate is not the answer - loving yourself enough to move on is the key to a better life. There are millions of people on the planet, and one or many of them will be very happy to spend time with you, or to have the opportunity to love you. Instead of looking back in anger, look forward with hope.

History of the Legend Sheik Ibrahim Sultan Ali

Sheik Ibrahim Sultan Ali was born 1909 in KEREN. He was one of the original proponents of the Eritrean Independence movement. Ibrahim was born in the city of Keren where he was educated in Islamic and Italian schools. He worked closely with Aboy Woldeab Woldemariam before the Federation with Ethiopia to secure Eritrean Independence. He was the founder of the Eritrean Muslim League.

     Joining the Eritrean Rail Ibrahim Sultan worked as a chief conductor from 1922 to 1926. From 1926 to 1941, he was head of Islamic Affairs section under Italian rule. In 1943 he founded a modern cheese and dairy plant in Tesseney. which he ran until 1945. The Eritrean Chamber of Commerce (ECC)was established later in that year and he became one of its senior staff members until the end of September 1946. At that time he was very active member.

    At the United Nations, Ibrahim envisioned a violent battle for independence if the UN acted against ""Eritrean interests, The Eritrean people's cause is a just cause of the independence of people who refuse and reject any form of annexation, dismember or a return to the hated colonialism no matter what type it would be, whatever form it takes, or from which direction it comes. This indisputable right to independence to which our country is attached can not be ignored without creating a new area of strife in East Africa, since the Eritrean people will never accept Ethiopian domination."" Sheik Ibrahim Sultan, "Statement by the Chairman of the delegation of the Muslim's League of Eritrea". Fifth session at the UN in 21-11-1950.
   He was nominally a member of the Eritrean Liberation Front (E.L.F) he broke away in 1970 and formed the People's Liberation Forces, (P.L.F) in the 70th which was an immediate precursor to the Eritrean People's Liberation Front (E.P.L.F) where he was reunited with his old ally from the pre-federation period, Aboy Woldeab Woldemariam.

Sheik Ibrahim died on 1 September 1987 (what would become the Eritrean Revolution Day) in Cairo, after having been sick for almost 6 years. He was buried on 5 September in Kassala Sudan by his Family and Fellow Eritreans.

 One of his most memorable speech is  
"My children of Eritrea, make peace amongst yourselves. Be united; Don't be Muslims and Christians. Avoid religious, ethnic and regional differences and confront your foes by forging solid unity. Because Eritrea is Dearest for us ans for our generation to come"" He was Right at all.

Understanding Why Falling In Love Can Be So Painful

At one point in our lifetime, every single one of us will fall madly and deeply in love with another person. Whether the experience be labelled as a teenage crush, an innocent infatuation, a soul mate union or even forbidden lust, no-one escapes the arrows of. Cupid’s bow whilst gracing this earth. Falling in love can be one of the most beautiful experiences we will ever have.
     The feelings, un acquainted happiness, enthusiastic child-like joy and renewed passion for living life, can all be felt in abundance, leaving us content with having found our own sense of heaven on earth.
So, why is this same happiness experienced during love also the cause of so much misery and sadness in one’s life as well?
  Most cases of depression and suicides are rooted in situations where a person has fallen in love (over 50% of love marriages in the west end up in divorce).
A multi-billion dollar industry has been created via psychiatrists, self-help books, relationship guides, mentors, coaches etc to help people understand what happens during love, yet no one has been able to really understand why falling in love can be so painful. No-one except the ancient gurus, who as always, have documented everything in the ancient texts.
The mind-body complex is made up of a variety of layers including the body, mind, intellect and ego. The ego is our most subtle layer, and is the final step before reaching what the yogis call our Atman (universal divine soul within us all).
  Overcoming the ego is in essence the overriding goal of all spiritual quests. The ego is what gives us an individual sense of identity. At this moment in time, my ego is telling me that is it me who is writing this article, whilst your ego is telling you that you are reading the same post. Ego differentiates from one being to another, and it’s a natural tendency of the mind to attach itself to one’s ego. Ego is not present at birth; it only manifests in a baby around 18 months or so, when it starts to develop its own personal characteristics.
  Our whole childhood and adolescence is rooted in ego through education and environment. We become separated from one another at a young age through name, gender, height, academic abilities, talents, race, colour, behaviour etc, and learn to identify ourselves through the identities created for us. We can go through our entire lives establishing our sense of individuality through the ego, and never question any other form of existence.
  Ego is firmly rooted in the concepts we have in our minds, however, love bypasses the mind and is manifested in the heart. Love cannot bear separation and continuously yearns to be united with the target of its affection.
  Think back to when you were in love; even the moments where your beloved was sitting right next to you, did they not still seem so far away? We want to possess what we love, and submerge totally in another’s thoughts and feelings. In love, we totally lose ourselves, our sense of identity, our sense of purpose, and can spend our whole time thinking, feeling, pondering and fantasising about our partner.
Love creates compassion and unity with another being; ego craves for individuality and a sense of separation from the rest of the world. Here lies the root of relationship conflicts, and explains why falling in love can cause us so much inner turmoil and pain.
Ego and love cannot exist together in complete harmony; sure, there may be a compromise from both sides, and an uneasy marriage of the two components, but ultimately their differences are too vast to ensure any lasting union.
   When a relationship breaks up, many times we blame the “other” person for all the problems we faced, and fall into despair when they cannot reciprocate the way we want them to love us. Our hearts dictate that our partner should think, feel, speak, love and honour exactly the way we want.
Our partner is expected to be in totally tuned in with our own thoughts. Ego on the other hand can only exist when it becomes rooted in a sense of individuality. Ego determines; “I think…, I speak…, I feel…, I love… etc for myself and no one else.” This constant battle between these two internal facets is ultimately what can wear us down, and turn the beautiful experience of love into a painful and miserable experience.
  The way to come out of such feelings is simply to raise your own awareness of who you really are. By going beyond your own ego, you will realise you are so much more than the individual labels society has given you.
  We are all part of a divine consciousness where everything belongs to everyone. The same way your left eye does not get jealous of your right eye, your love for another being will never get distorted if you feel a strong sense of belongings to this entire creation. If the whole cosmos belongs to you, then surely your lover is also a part of you too. If your lover is already a part of you, how could you ever feel hurt or pain with whatever he or she does? Whether your lover reciprocates your feelings, or whether they reject your advances, it really does not matter. It’s our very own sense of identity and expectations which causes our own misery.
  Vivekananda (a well known physiology writer ) once wrote: “There is not a single blow we receive in this world, which we have not brought upon about ourselves.” The statement is highly controversial for most people, but he is speaking from an extremely elevated perspective, where he is referring to how our lack of awareness of our true infinite nature is the only cause of any problems we face in this world.
  Not everybody will comprehend this article, as we are now going beyond the scope of rationale thinking and entering the realms of logic knowledge. Yoga is a combination of experiencing life, and uncovering deep-rooted knowledge within. Falling in love is perhaps one of the most life-defining moments any of us will ever have, yet so little is understood about what really happens during the whole process.
  When falling in love, pain is inevitable, but prolonged misery can be optional simply by studying the essence of whom and what we really are. Yoga goes a long way towards guiding us to how our minds work, and how we can overcome any mental or emotional problems we may face along the way.

Scientists prove it really is a thin line between love and hate

Love and hate are intimately linked within the human brain, according to a study that has discovered the biological basis for the two most intense emotions.
Scientists studying the physical nature of hate have found that some of the nervous circuits in the brain responsible for it are the same as those that are used during the feeling of romantic love – although love and hate appear to be polar opposites.
A study using a brain scanner to investigate the neural circuits that become active when people look at a photograph of someone they say they hate has found that the "hate circuit" shares something in common with the love circuit.
The findings could explain why both hate and romantic love can result in similar acts of extreme behaviour – both heroic and evil – said Professor Semir Zeki of University College London, who led the study published in the on-line journal PloS ONE.
"Hate is often considered to be an evil passion that should, in a better world, be tamed, controlled and eradicated. Yet to the biologist, hate is a passion that is of equal interest to love," Professor Zeki said.
"Like love, it is often seemingly irrational and can lead individual to heroic and evil deeds. How can two opposite sentiments lead to the same behaviour?"
The study advertised for volunteers to take part in the study and 17 people were chosen who professed a deep hatred for one individual. Most chose an ex-lover or a competitor at work, although one woman expressed an intense hatred for a famous political figure.
Professor Zeki and John Romaya of the Wellcome Laboratory of Neurobiology analysed the activity of the neural circuits in the brain that lit up when the volunteers were viewing photos of the hated person.
They found that the hate circuit includes parts of the brain called the putamen and the insula, found in the sub-cortex of the organ. The putamen is already known to be involved in the perception of contempt and disgust and may also be part of the motor system involved in movement and action.
"Significantly, the putamen and the insula are also both activated by romantic love. This is not surprising. The putamen could also be involved in the preparation of aggressive acts in a romantic context, as in situations when a rival presents a danger," Professor Zeki said.
"Previous studies have suggested that the insula may be involved in responses to distressing stimuli, and the viewing of both a loved and a hated face may constitute such a distressing signal."
One major difference between love and hate appears to be in the fact that large parts of the cerebral cortex – associated with judgement and reasoning – become de-activated during love, whereas only a small area is deactivated in hate.
"This may seem surprising since hate can also be an all-consuming passion like love. But whereas in romantic love, the lover is often less critical and judgemental regarding the loved person, it is more likely that in the context of hate the hater may want to exercise judgement in calculating moves to harm, injure or otherwise exact revenge," Professor Zeki said.
"Interestingly, the activity of some of these structures in response to a hated face is proportional in strength to the declared intensity of hate, thus allowing the subjective state of hate to be objectively quantified. This finding may have implications in criminal cases."
Source:- The Independent

DID YOU KNOW THOSE FACTS ABOUT ERITREA

The following are interesting facts about Eritrea and Eritreans.

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1) The name Nara means “Sky heaven”

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The Nara name means “sky, heaven”. Their language is called “Nara

Bana”, meaning “Nara talk.” (1976, Marvin Lionel Bender, 

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2) The name “Beni-Amir” means “Sons of Amir”

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The Beni-Amir are either regarded as a separate ethnic group or as the largest clan within the Tigre ethnic group. Their clan name of Beni Amir means “Sons of Amir” (2003, Favali, Pateman, p.28).

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3) The name Kunama means “natural”

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“The term Kunama means natural” ( 2001, Istituto italiano per l’Africa, p.575). Among the Kunama if an individual misbehaves, often people would utter that the person is not behaving the “Kunama way” (i. e, the natural way). Similarly if you request drinking water from a woman who also has beer, the woman would ask you bia Kunama benube aifa? The meaning of this stement is “do you want natural water or beer?” In these two contexts the word Kunama is used to mean natural.” ( 2001, Istituto italiano per l’Africa, p.575)

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4) The name Tigrinya means “Tigre language”

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Tigre of Tigr-inya is the speaker, while the suffix -inya  in Tigrinya denotes to “language,” (1996, Kjetil Tronvoll, p.30)

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5) The name Rashaida means “Refugee”

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The Rashida means “refugee” in Arabic -(1996, Kjetil Tronvoll, p.27)

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6) The name Blin (Bilen) is thought to derive from Saho, which means “Christians”

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The meaning of the word ‘Bilin’ also is not known. Some version of the tradition holds that it is Saho word (belen) for Christian. In fact, ‘Belen’ in Saho means a Christian. (Kiflemariam Hamdé, ‘Absmará yunivarsiti, p.3)

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7) The name Afar means “the free”

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Afar, meaning “the free,” is the name the Danakil give themselves..” (1976, Georg Gerster, 49)

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 The name Saho means “nomad”

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The term “Saho” means nomad (“Saa” means animals, “hoo” means  caretaker). This is essentially a linguistic classification, as they speak a common language, the Saho. (2010, Abdulkader Saleh Mohammad, p.111)

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9) The name Dahlak islands means “Gates of Hell”

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Do to the forbidding climate of the Dahlak islands, it is believed to have been derived from an Arabic word, ‘Dah’ala’, whose translation is the “gates of hell”. (Dahalik: Mysterious Tongue of the Dahlak Islands, by Hanna Azbaha )

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10) The name of Eritrea’s town Mendefera means “No one dared”

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Mendefera (literally meaning ‘No One Dared’) is a reference to the fierce resistance put up by the local people against Italian colonialisation.(2006, Phillips, Carillet, p. 337)

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11)The name of Eritrea’s port city Massawa means “Shout loudly”

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Most theories advanced seem to agree on the lingusitic roots of the word Massawa, which would be a Tigre word derived from the Ge’ez word Mesuwa’, meaning “cry, loud call.” According to one version, a fisherman from Dahlak, surpised by a storm, was thrown by the winds with his boat onto an uninhabited island that was situated very close to the mainland. Following his return to Dahlak, he described it as so small that if one shouted strong enough he could make himself heard on the other side of the island. From that point onward, the Daalakis who began to settle there called it “Massawa.” The other version relates that before the causeways connecting Massawa to mainland were built (1870), when traders came to the port their caravans, they reached Gherar on the mainland, and had to shout to the boatmen on Massawa Island to come and get them and their goods to the island-town. (2009, Jonathan Miran, p. 123)

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12) The name of Eritrea’s capital Asmara means “United”

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Asmara grew from four villages founded in the twelfth century AD. Originally, it is said, there were four clans living in the Asmara area on the Kebessa Plateau: the Gheza Gurtom, the Gheza Shelele, the Gheza Serenser and Gheza Asmae. Encouraged by their women, the men united the four clans and defeated the bandits who preyed on the area. After the victory, a new name was given to the place; Arbaete Asmara which literally means, in the Tigrinya language, “the four are united.” Eventually Arabaete was droppped and it has been called Asmara, though there is still a zone called Arbaete Asmara. (2007, Keith Fauscett, p. 121)

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13) The word Asmara in Indonesia means “Love”

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In Indonesia the word asmara means love – (1974, Sudarsono, p.44)

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14) The name of Eritrea’s city Keren means “Rocky” in Blin and “Mountain” in Tigrinya.

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“the name ‘Keren’ derived from two Eritrean languages Bilen and Tigrigna. The word ‘Krna’ in Bilen means stony or rocky, and ‘keren’ in Tigrigna means mountain (2007, by Denison, Paice, p.189)

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15) Eritrea after Egypt has the second highest archeological historical discoveries in Africa.

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The number of archeological sites in the country which was 45,000 previously has now increased to 80,000… Eritrea ranks second after Egypt in Africa for its rich archeological sites and historical places. (Dr. Yosief Libsekal, head of the Eritrean National Museum.)

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16) There are Two Nigerian ethnic groups who live in Eritrea.

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The Hausa and Bargo Nigerian-Eritreans, who are collectively called the Tokharir, migrated to Eritrea almost a century ago. ”…. the Tokharir, who arrived from Nigeria having made the pilgrimage to Mecca many centuries ago and did not have the means to get themselves home, so they stopped in Eritrea and eastern sudan and have remained there ever since. They are found in the western lowlands, especially around Tesseni, and in some areas around Keren.” (2007, Denison,Paice, p.37)

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17) In the 1962 nations cup won by Ethiopia, 9 of the 11 starters of that team were Eritreans.

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Their names were: Lucian Vassalo, Tesfay Gebremedhin, Berhe Goitom (Patata), Etalo Vassalo, Kiflom Araya, Gilamichael Tesfamariam (wedi Mariano), Haile Tesfagaber, Tekle Kidane, Asmelash Berhe, Tsegay Tesfay, Negassi Gebremichael and Berhane Beyene were Eritreans who were part of the 1962 historic Ethiopian National team. (by Esseyas Fsehaye, Shabait, 2010)

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18) Many Eritrean villages in the Eritrean highlands are named after Beja place-names.

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During the Beja kingdoms of Eritrea (8th – 14 century AD) the 9th century Arab geographer Al-Ya’qubi wrote of six Beja kingdoms located in what is today Eritrea. Beja place names are found throughout the central and northern highlands of Eritrea, suggesting widespread Beja interaction with other communities (2008, Schmidt, Curtis, Teka , p. 284)

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19) Eritrea’s Dahlak Islanders were the first Muslim converts in the Horn of Africa.

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Based on direct archaeological evidence, the Dahlak Islands, off the coast of Eritrea, are the oldest Muslim coummunites in the horn Africa (2003, Timothy Insoll, P.49)

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20) In Tigre and Tigrinya P-sounds occur only in foreign loan words

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“In Tigre and Tigrinya P occurs in foreign words. (1966, Tucker,Bryan, p. 595) According to Woldu (1985), /p/ does not exist in the phonology of Tigrinya, though schooled Tigrinya speakers have little difficulty in pronouncing and perceiving it. It is mostly used for Italian loanwords (pane, polizia, posta, etc.). (2008, Heine, Nurse, p.65)

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21) Most Kunama believe in their traditional god named Anna.

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“most Kunama remain pagans who believe in a supreme being called Anna.” (2004, Shinn, Ofcansky, Prouty, p.245)

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22) The earliest written Tigrinya discovered dates to the 13th century in Logosadara, Eritrea.

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“An especially interesting reference was made by the Italian scholar Carlo Conti Rossini in his introduction to Mauro da Leonessa’s Tigrinya Grammar, where he speaks of land contracts from Enda Abba Matta that show ‘indications from the 13th century that the Tigrinya language was already formed’. He also mentions an Eritrean monk called Yeshaq who between 1403 and 1450 is said to have written in Tigrinya. What exactly constituted these ‘indications’ and what any such early Tigrinya material might have been is not known.” (2008, Andrew Simpson, p. 227)

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23) In the early 1940s, the British wanted to turn Eritrea into a Jewish colony

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“Early on the research department had added a new dimension to the Eritrean problem by suggesting that Britain support a Jewish settlement in Eritrea. The primary purpose of creating a Jewish colony in Eritrea was to divert Jewish immigration from Palestine and thereby to relax tensions in the British dominion in Palestine itself. In support of their recommendation, the authors of these findings argued that Eritrea had a suitable climate and sufficient unexploited land to be used for Jewish colonization. (1991, Okbazghi Yohannes, p. 64)

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24) The oldest settled civilization in the horn of Africa is found in Eritrea.

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“The remains of what is thought to be the oldest settled agricultural community in Africa have been discovered on the outskirts of the Eritrean capital, Asmara, the United Nations has said.” (5-22-2002, BBC )

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25) Human ancestry migrated out of Africa north along Eritrea’s Red Sea coast.

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Bob walter discovered the oldest evidence of stone tools near a marine environment. Dating at 125,000 years old, the find suggest early human ancestry migrated out of Africa north along Eritrea’s red sea coast (July, 2000, GeoTimes)

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26) Afar women usually don’t quest courtship with a man who hasn’t killed another man.

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“Afars culture emphasizes a man’s strength and bravery, and prestige comes traditionally from killing one’s enemy. The strinkingly beautiful Afar women will usually not consider courtship with a man who has never killed another man. They hope for a husband who wears the iron bracelet indicating that he has killed ten men.” (2002, James Minahan, p.42)

ውጽኢት ምርጫ ብከመይ ይውሰን?

    ዚኾነ ምርጫ ኣብ ትሕቲ ዚተወሰነ ቅጥዕን ኣገባብን እዩ ዚኻየድ። ምርጫታት ዚውሰንሉ ኣገባባት ብዙሓት ክህልዉ ዚኽእሉ እኳ እንተኾኑ፣ እቶም ዚውቱራት ግና ክልተ እዮም።ንሳቶም ድማ፣ ብመሰረት ተዛማዲ ብዝሕን፣ ውሳነ ብመሰረት ፍጹም ብዝሕን ይብሃሉ።ኣብዚ ዘሎናዮ መዋእል፣ እቲ ስልጣን ንምጭባጥ ዚግበር ውድድር መብዛሕትኡ፣ ግዜ ኣብ መንጎ ሰልፍታት ‘ዩ ዚኻየድ። ስለፍታት ሕጹያት ብምቕራብን ህዝቢ ብምውዳብን ኣብ መስርሕ’ቲ ምርጫ ዓቢ ተራ ይጻውታ። ነፍሲ ወከፍ፣ ሰልፊ ‘ወን ኣብቲ ዝኻየድ ውድድር ንክትዕወት ኣበርቲዓ ትቃለስ።
    እቲ ውድድር ኣብ መንጎ ክልተ ሕጹያት ዚኻየድ ምስ ዚኸውን፣ እቲዓብላሊ ድምጺ ዚረኸበ ሕጹይ ተዓዋቲ ስለዚኸውን፣ ውጺኢት ናይቲ ምርጫ ንምፍላጥ ኣየሸግርን ። ብካልእ ኣዘራርባ ‘ቲ ካብ ፍርቂ ንላዕሊ ድምጺ ዚረኸበ፣ ሕጹይ ተዓዋቲ ይኸውን። ኣብ ሓደ ውድድር ስለስተ ወይ ድማ ካብኡ ንላዕሊ ተወዳደርቲ ሕጹያት ዚሳተፍዎ ምርጫ ግን፣ ዚኾነ ይኹን ተወዳዳሪ ሕጹይ ክዕወት ብውሕዱ ካብ ነፍስወከፍ ውልቀ መወዳድርቱ ዚበዝሐ ድምጺ ክረክብ ኣለዎ። እዚ ክኸውን ዚኽእል ግን፣ እቲ ውጺኢት ምርጫ ብመስረት ተዛማዲ ብዝሒ ዝውሰን ምስ ዝኸውን እዩ።እቲ ውጺኢት ምርጫ ብመሰረት ፍጹም ብዝሒ ዚውሰን ምስ ዝኸውን ግን፣ ዚኾነ ይኹን ተወዳዳሪ( ሕጹይ ) ክዕወት ብውሕዱ ካብቲ ጠቕላላ ድምር ብዝሒ ናይ መወዳድርቱ ንላዕሊ፣ ማለት ካብቲ ጠቕላላ ብዝሒ ድምጺ ልዕሊ ፍርቂ ክረኽብ ኣለዎ።
   ንኣብነት ፣ኣብ ሓደ ኣብ መንጎ ኣርባዕተ ሕጹያት ዚግበር ውድድር እቶም ሕጹያት ፣ 15%፣ 20 %፣ 30 % ፣ 35% ድምጺ ምስ ዝረክቡ እቲ 35% ድምጺ ዚረኸበ ሕጹይ ተዓዋቲ ይኸውን። እቲ ምርጫ ብመስረት ፍጹም ብዝሒ ዝውሰን ምስ ዚኸውን ግን፣ ካብ ኣርባዕቲኦም ሕጹያት ዚዕወት የለን።ምክንያቱ ኣብዚ ኣገባብ’ዚዚኾነ ይኹን ሕጹይ ንኽዕወት በይኑ ካብ 50 % ንላዕሊ ድምጺ ክረክብ የድልዮ።ኣብቲ ስልጣን ንምጭባጥ ኣብ መንጎ ሰልፍታት ዚግበር ውድድር፣ ቁጽሪ ናተን ዚወዳዳራ ሰልፍታት ክልተ ጥራይ ምስ ዝኸውን፣ እታ ዚተዓወተት ሰልፊ ኣብቲ ሓጋጊ ባይቶ ካብ ፍርቂ ንላዕሊ መናብር ስለዚህልዋ ጽኑዕ ዚኾነ ምምሕዳር ክትምስርት ኣየጸግማን ።
   ቁጽሪ ናይተን ሰልፍታት ካብ ክልተ ንላዕሊ ምስ ዚከውን ግን፣ መብዛሕቱኡ ግዜ ሓንቲ ሰልፊ በይና ካብ ፍርቂ ንላዕሊ ድምጺ ከተምጽእ ስለዘሸግር እቲ ምምሕዳር ብልፍንቲ ናይ ክልተ ወይ ድማ ካብኡ ንላዕሊ ሰልታት እዩ ዚምስረት።ከምዚ ዚኣመሰለ ብልፍንቲ ዚቖመ ስሮኣት ጽንዓት ክህልዎ ድማ፣ እተን ነቲ ልፍንቲ ዘቖማ ሰልፍታት ኣብ ስርሓት ናቲ ምምሕዳር ከም ሓደ ኣካል ኮይነን ክሰርሓን ከድምጻን ኣለወን።
ጹH

To Marry or Not

Getting married is once in a lifetime decision for many people. When people wish to get married, invariably all of them expect a full life together. Very few would think of marriage as a short-term exercise. Hence, it is very much necessary that all aspects of a life together be fully analyzed before tying the knot. Usually men and women tend to have different perspectives about married life. It would be better to have open and honest discussion to sort out the possible future irritants or at least understand them so that some sort of compromise could be arrived at.
  The reasons that a man looks at while desiring to marry her are in numerous. However, a few of them top the list in order of priority. For most men, the need of a woman in life is necessitated by the motherly love that he had received in his early life. He needs a woman who can show him the same love and who could fulfill his physical and emotional needs. That is why many men look for the same qualities in a woman that their mothers possess. The second reason is to have a lifetime companion, who can share his desires and needs. The third reason is love. When a man feels that he loves a particular woman, he wants to own her fully. This might appear to be a wrong reason but that is the way humans are made. Everybody likes to possess what he or she desires and human relationships are no different. In some cases, the man might marry a woman because she has become pregnant and is carrying his child. Certain men wish to marry a woman who is having the same career as his, so that they would be able to adapt to each other better. It is quite usual for a doctor to marry a doctor and a lawyer to marry a lawyer. They would be able to understand the work pattern and the workload of each other. However, few others are very particular that the woman is having a different profession, so that their interests do not clash. This choice depends on the outlook of the individual.

In short men marry women for the following main reasons.
The wish to continue the motherly love received in childhood.
Desire to have a lifetime companion.
The love the man has for the woman.
The woman having become pregnant by him Oh Yea it is silly
To have a woman who has a similar career or differently for easier adaptability.

Women also marry men for nearly the same reasons. However, one important reason that women have in marriage is to escape from parents that they do not like or from a parent who is abusive. Sometimes, men also marry for this reason but the number is much lesser than women. So the reasons for a woman marrying a man can be enumerated as follows.

Wish to escape from parents.
Desire to have a lifetime companion.
Love for the man.
Having become pregnant by the man.
To have a man having a similar career for easier adaptability.

The reasons for getting married are quite obvious. On the other hand, the reasons for not getting married are much more complicated. In fact, it would be difficult to mention reasons for not getting married. However, the reasons for a marriage becoming a failure could be discussed with more ease. There are several jokes about marriage but nearly all of them are at the expense of the woman. There should be some strong reasons for that. Probably, the main reasons are the innumerable needs that women have that drain the purse of a man and the continuous nagging that women indulge in after marriage. One joke says that a successful man is one who can make more money than his wife spends but a successful woman is one who finds such a man. Many women tend to nag the men too much after marriage. They try to compare their husbands with other men who are more successful in life, which is resented by the husbands. Wives also tend to give free advice to men as to what they should and should not do, which is also not liked by many men.

Infidelity is one more reason that could harm the institution of marriage. Both men and women, who are quite possessive, would be repelled when they come to know about extra-marital relationships, leading to separation. Physical incompatibility is the cause for break-up in several cases. Even loss of interest in sexual relationship after some time could lead to a break-up of the marriage. Finally, the conflict in tastes and interests that appeared insignificant before the marriage starts to take a larger picture in married life. Disagreements increase, resulting in final separation.

Even though it would look absurd if we list reasons for not getting married, we could list the reasons that break-up marriage.

Over-spending by the wife and living beyond the man his income

Continuous nagging, comparing the man to others more successful, and giving unwarranted advice

Infidelity

Physical incompatibility or sharp decrease in sexual interest

Conflict in tastes and interests leading to disagreements and fight. At the end RED CARD for the Marriage

10 Reasons why Women Cheat

For Example Diane Lane did it in Unfaithful. Annette Bening did it in American Beauty. Sarah Jessica Parker did it on Sex and the City. And they’re not the only ones. Although women haven’t surpassed men on the cheating scale, when I read the NY Times last week more married women than ever before are jumping in the sack with someone other than their husbands. According to an American Sexual Behavior study, 14% of married women have cheated at least once, compared to 22% of married men. Not that we’re condoning two-timing from either party, but here are the top 10 reasons women cheat.
                                                   *10-Not Enough Sex
Remember the good old days when you could stay up forever fooling around? Then responsibility entered the mix -- and kids -- and before you knew it, sleep was more important than sex. Well, women want to feel wanted. If you’re not making her feel that way, she could seek it elsewhere. To keep that spark alive, ask her out on date nights, send her provocative emails at lunch, and by all means, don’t let life get in the way of kissing, cuddling and sex.
                                                    *9-Being The Bad Girl
Just as men feel the urge to sow their wild oats, some women have an inner sex kitten just waiting to be unleashed -- and when the beast escapes from the cage, look out.
                                                *frisky behavior
usually rears its ugly head in response to some sort of life change -- major weight loss, new job, new friends, mid-life crisis, etc. Keep the lines of communication open and she’ll be more likely to talk to you about what’s going on instead of spilling her guts to a stranger in the night.
                                             *8-Self-Esteem
Sex can be an instant pick-me-up; a self-esteem booster that makes women feel sexier, more beautiful and more loved. If your wife or girlfriend has self-esteem issues, it doesn’t mean she’s automatically going to cheat -- and it’s certainly not your fault if she does -- but there are ways to make her feel secure in the relationship that could help her from straying. Pay attention to her, ask her questions and don’t hold back on compliments -- a little flattery goes a long way with women.
                                             *7-Revenge/Payback For Past Wrongs
No, you didn’t cheat, but whether you blew your retirement fund in Vegas or got caught in a
big lie, you did break her trust (and, possibly, her heart). She feels wounded and betrayed -- and wants to hurt you the same way you hurt her. To regain her trust, it’s not enough just to tell her you’re sorry; you have to show her. Actions speak louder than words
                                                *6-Lack Of Intimacy
You have it all: the house, the two-car garage and the two-and-a-half bathrooms -- at least on the outside. But inside, the relationship is lacking the one thing women want most: intimacy. It’s not just sex that makes women feel connected in a relationship; it’s touching, kissing, cuddling, and communicating. Women crave it, and she could seek it elsewhere if she’s not getting it at home. To improve intimacy, spend quality time together, give her a foot massage, make a romantic dinner for two -- anything that will give her a sense of unity and closeness.
                                       *5-Feeling Neglected/Ignored Under appreciated
Women wear many hats in a relationship -- housekeeper, errand-runner, grocery shopper, babysitter, etc. When she feels more like a maid than a girlfriend/wife, that’s when she could stray. The fact that you spend all your time at work or on the golf course gives her double reason to seek attention elsewhere. No, you can’t quit your job, but you can thank her for all her selfless deeds -- and do your share around the house.
                                           *4-Your Emotional Withdrawal
Women are emotional beings. Not only do they need physical support, but they also need emotional support. Once you retreat from the relationship, she sees it as a sign that things are through -- a breakup is inevitable. So, she’s not really cheating, she’s moving on. To avoid this, be present in the relationship. Yes, that means sharing your icky feelings, but it’s better than the alternative, right?
                                        *3-Bedroom Boredom
Sex can become monotonous if you let it -- the same position; the same setting; the same person. An affair adds adventure and gets her adrenaline flowing. To avoid routine, avoid repetition. Sweep her away for the weekend, make out at the movies, kiss her for no reason at all... The unexpected adds excitement.
                                         *2-Exit Strategy
Instead of breaking up with you, she cheats on you. That way she doesn’t have to deal with the broken relationship, which is much harder to fix. An affair is the easy way out -- or at least that’s how she sees it. That’s another reason communication is key. Let her know that she can talk to you about anything and that you love her enough to work through any bumps in the relationship road.
                                        *1-Revenge For Your Cheating
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Because you cheated, she wants to get back at you and give you a dose of your own medicine. Cheating is her vengeance, her chance to even the playing field. No, you can’t undo your indiscretion, but you can ask for her forgiveness, assure her it will
never happen again and suggest couples therapy to help you get through this tough time.
Her Cheating Heart
When you add up all the reasons women cheat, it’s usually her heart (or her ego) that needs healing, not her libido. Keep the lines of communication open, be supportive and encouraging and work at keeping that spark ignited. In other words: Don’t give her a reason to stray well honestly if my misses does like that no way I can keep that relationship safe for a second in Islam we say "I Divorce you three of them"Sorry if I said unexpected words.

What Makes Men Fall in Love

There’s into you, and then there’s head-over-heels saga. These little things tip a man over that edge when you fall in LOVE. It’s a baffling question: Is there some specific moment or event that makes a guy suddenly decide
    “Yes, I think I love her”?
Well, the answer isn’t clear-cut, but there are some general principles. “Men have certain innate needs that must be met before they truly feel connected to you,” and everybody know that if I'm no wrong.
*The Secret theory of How We Fall in Love.
When a guy realizes, consciously or not, that you’re ideal on all these levels, that’s when he’ll commit.”Boiled down, guys have four primal relationship desires that are sometimes sated by the tiniest of moves by you. Here, some people explain it with examples so you can put these insights to use when your
guy is at the brink.
*The Desire: To Protect or help
Believe it or not, the so-called stoic sex is hard wired to nurture. Sheltering you from harm makes him feel suddenly, which makes him feel good. “Not that you should act helpless, but letting him see your vulnerable side will bring him closer because it unlocks his instincts to take care of you,” and that knows it.
 So give him chances to take charge, and thank him after he does. When a guy associates you with feeling like Superman, of course he’ll want to couple up. These little things can draw out his hero side.
Give him a job. Ask him to fix or build you something. Performing concrete tasks is a way of bonding that enhances his sense of success.
Ask his opinion. Whether it’s about your 401 (the mother thing ) options or  it telegraph that you value his brain as much as you do his brawn.
*The Desire: Freedom
Even emotionally healthy men want assurance that their identities will stay put after they’ve become half a happy couple. “By making it clear that you don’t expect your guy to change, he’ll feel like you truly understand him but don’t threaten his sense of self,”
*Secrets You Keep from Yourself.
That leaves him feeling on sturdy enough ground to commit.” The following moves let him know you’re no ball and chain.
Blow him off. Men hate the idea of being tied down socially, so turn down occasional plans. He’ll not only feel easier — and open up more — around you, but he’ll also start to wonder what you’re doing and pursue you more.Share your own fears. Guys often hold back because they think most chicks are baby-hungry ring-hunters. So if you feel nervous about committing, let him know. He’ll be reassured that you’re navigating new waters too, not trying to trap him.
Reinvent yourself. Little changes in your appearance now and then — say, hair up in a ponytail one day, down the next, etc. — remind him that you’ve got zillions of facets to your personality too.
*Desire to Read: no ruts or  risks.
Respect his privacy. A physical space that’s totally his is a huge symbol of independence to a man. Signal that you respect that by, say, staying out of desk drawers and not peeking at his caller ID when his phone rings
*The Desire: To Shine
Maybe he’s cocky, but he’s still insecure. Trust me, guys need to know that they’re respected and appreciated. “When being around you increases a guy’s esteem, both internally and in the eyes of others, he’ll naturally want to be attached to you,”  Here, things that show your high value and nudge him toward love.
Make him happier. Laugh when one of you loses balance during sex. Go to stupid movies. Drag him out when he’s crabby. If you can keep things light, even during stressful times, you’ll become indispensable.
Be a social butterfly. Guys are good at left-brain stuff, like sales and sports, but can get awkward when it comes to social graces. Take the lead and charm the people you meet and he’ll be extra grateful to have you. But he may take credit for making those new friends...whatever.
*The Desire: Comfort
“Falling in love is a process of developing attachment, which happens when something emotion floods to the brain then You can unleash those love hormones by making him feel like you two just “fit each other .” When he’s so comfortable with you that he stops thinking about your relationship and simply enjoys it, he’ll find himself nudged into love territory. Take these tips maybe they can help.
Let him see you prim. Grooming in front of him enhances intimacy because it’s something other guys don’t get to witness. Just keep it goddess like (applying lipstick or powder), not gross (bleaching your mustache).
Cook together if she isn't Besoro. Being around food spikes his love motion. the more he’ll associate you with the good feelings he gets from eating it.
Stock your pad. When buying groceries you don’t have a preference on, get a brand he uses. He’ll subconsciously feel at home at your place. Sleep with him mostly in light days. Cat nap near him or let yourself doze off in his arms so he sees you in your most trusting, completely relaxed state. Mostly don't forget to have sex with him in day time in three places like in Leaving Room,in the Shower and the kitchen. I hope it works well it will believe me and the funny of it is I don't believe In LOVE.